Sunday, April 5, 2009

It's better to have gone and left then to have never gone at all...

So on Monday morning I woke up and headed South towards home. I've never been good at good-bye's, let me restate that I'm REALLY bad at good-bye's. It usually takes me a good 24 hours to get past the tears. When I was at my Miss BFF's house the night before she gave me a card to read that I had written to her oldest son when he was born, she had kept it and now he keeps it in a special place. I wish that I would have made a copy, I was a 17 year old who nothing about a baby, but I told him I wanted to be the first person to ever write him because I knew I wouldn't be there for a lot of his firsts and that it made me very sad. But that I loved him so very much and he would always be in my heart everyday. I hope those two little ones know how much I love and miss them. I pray everyday for them and God's plan for them. Thanks to texting being the cool thing to do, they have no problem giving me a "shout out" almost everyday and I love every minute of it.
Leaving Granny is even harder... it's been a week and I'm still fighting the tears. She is my greatest supporter. Words can't express how I feel for her. When I was a young girl, I stayed the summers at my grandparents house from the day school got out til the day before it started. I can remember growing up every Sunday morning while getting dressed for church they would listen to Charles Stanley, a well-known preacher in Atlanta. I never thought much of it at the time. But now that I'm older as I'm flipping though the stations getting ready on Sunday mornings (or lying in bed when I should be getting ready) I turn to Charles Stanley and watch. A few years ago, he was preaching a sermon on the value of telling your children about Christ and how that was the most valuable inheritance you can give them. I sat on the bed listening and weeping. And I had the opportunity to do something I will never regret and I hope one day will bring me comfort. I picked up the phone called my grandmother and asked if she was watching Charles Stanley and of course she was. And I said "thank you". I was 13 years old when I gave my heart to the Lord in the living room of their house. I wasn't a perfect child/teenager but I knew I always answered to someone much bigger than my mom or grandparents. I knew there was someone who loved me more than they could. And I praise him everyday. We talked til we both missed Church. I told her everything that I appreciated about her and my grandfather and told her stories of things that I remembered about their love for their family and each other, that she didn't even realize I'd noticed. I feel so blessed that I was able to tell her how I felt while I have the opportunity.

This was going to be a post about my trip home but it brought me to another place. But thank you for listening.

"Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened"
~ Dr. Suess


  1. Aww. . thanks for sharing. Great post.

  2. That was such a wonderful post! It is so hard to leave the place you call home but it is so amazing to know what you will find when you return!

  3. Awww, you sound like such a wonderful grandaughter and friend. Whata blessing to read a post like this. Thank you for sharing!